Something a bit different this time. Our submitter writes: “We’re currently about 3 weeks away from putting on a festival and therefore working round the clock, surviving on Kit Kats and crying blood. The girl who takes care of our Facebook stuff was also working this evening and a character called Daniel popped up. What followed made us laugh for a while, but also feel a bit sad for humanity. Strangely, 99% of the bands we turn down for the festival are really lovely – even the band who informed us we were making a huge mistake as they were about to embark on a huge tour supporting The Proclaimers.”

Transcription follows.

Daniel:
Hallo there

Abbie [from the festival]:
hey :)

Daniel:
Can I speak to one of the Festival organisers?
I’ve been e mailing you for along while

Abbie:
unfortunately i only do the facebook :)

Daniel:
but have not received any respopnse
It is about a band booking for [the festival]
Who can I contact directly and on what tel numbers or e mails to receive a response?

Abbie:
ah ok, i know they receive a ton of emails, especially from bands
2000 artists submitted their details this year

Daniel:
They may do

Abbie:
and all stages are booked now

Daniel:
But I approached the organisers perosnally

Abbie:
i’d imagine a lot of people did :)

Daniel:
and nobody bothered to respond either way
So who is in charge and available on wehat numbers and e mail addresses?
Can yopu rpovide me with their names and details?
In any case, who am I speaking to?
Are you one of the organisers?

Abbie:
no, i just do the facebook…
i can’t really pass on numbers

Daniel:
who can?
who can?

Abbie:
are you a booking agent?

Daniel:
How is the organiser to be contacted?
As e mais are never responded to?
?

Abbie:
who have you been emailing? they are incredibly busy, and unfortunately sometimes all emails can’t be responded to…are you a booking agent?

Daniel:
Check out my details on line – will tell you all about who I am and what I do
I thought if you were with the organisers you would have known of me! ?

Abbie:
i have said twice now i do the facebook
which band are you representing?

Daniel:
I am [names band] band manager
[names some acronym] Music Management Group

Abbie:
do you have a website?

Daniel:
all deails available from here

Abbie:
i don’t really need details to be honest, i just googled “[name of management company]” and nothing came up.

Daniel:
Either way, what you can do is to tell organisers to contact me

Abbie:
how long have you been booking for artists Daniel, because it doesn’t really work like that…unless a band is well known
then they go to the agents, etc

Daniel:
?
Who am I speaking to ?
Can you identify yourself?

Abbie:
yes, my names abbie, i work on the facebook for [XXXX] Festival…

Daniel:
ok
Many thanks
How old are you?

Abbie:
this is getting a bit weird…?
i’m 25

Daniel:
Many thx
So how can I get hold of the organisers?

Abbie:
i thought you’d been in touch already? who had you been in touch with?

Daniel:
As they are not responding to written correspondence

Abbie:
what is it regarding?

Daniel:
Ok Abby I thank you for your help so far
I ll ask one of my assistants to get hold of the otganisers
So far received no repsonse at all

Abbie:
in regards…?

Daniel:
Regarding band bookings

Abbie:
all bands are booked Daniel.

Daniel:
I thank you for your help so far, but I really need to speak to the otganisers
Good night